I’ve decided to embark on a new venture: Blogging. Now I know what you’re thinking: good god, why? Don’t you talk enough already? How could you possibly have anything worthwhile left to say?

SHUT UP.

I may have a lot to say, most of which acts as annoying background noise for the rest of the world but I’ve also done some things, seen some things, been some places (not really, mostly just the inside of my house and my patio). I’ve experimented with a variety of career choices: funeral director, receptionist, manager, yoga teacher, some other desk job that I’m pretty sure for which I was only hired as decoration (gosh, that’s awful vain of her. Like I said: SHUT UP.)

I’ve done my fair share of household experiments as well: cooking, writing (not simultaneously), drinking, internet stalking (almost exclusively simultaneously), pet having, stepmothering, DIY projects, fitness….I mean the list is truly endless. Some of these experiments have yielded great results, others not so much. But now here I am. So, welcome to The Morning Laboratory where I’m fucking shit up, so that you don’t have to.

You’re welcome.

As a solid introduction to what you’re in for may I suggest my post on Dressing Your Very Bitey Dog in Lace Panties; here we discuss best methods for doing so, how to exploit your dog on the internet, and try to figure out what the hell went fundamentally wrong with you as a child to lead you down this path of sick behavior.

See you in the lab.

Maggie